Never Say Never, But Never Say Always

Never say never, but never say always - a delicate dance of corporate doublespeak. It's all about saying one thing, but meaning another. It's like a game of corporate Twister: you have to spin it just right, or risk being caught in the vortex of your own lies.

Here are some expert tips to help you navigate this treacherous landscape:

• Say "I'm a team player" while secretly planning to sabotage the team.
• Use jargon to obscure the truth, and pretend it's just a "synergy opportunity".
• Make a "bold" move, but really just be trying not to get fired.