Stapler Arms: The Office Hazard

Warning: do not attempt to use this stapler under any circumstances, as it may result in serious injury or death.

Caution: the stapler arms may stick to your skin, causing painful removal and subsequent embarrassment at the office Christmas party.

Features:

• Sharp points that will pierce your skin like a hot knife
• A built-in stapler arm that will stick to your hand
• A sleek and modern design that screams "I have no regard for your safety or comfort"

Subpages:

Learn more about removing the stapler arms from your skin

How to maintain your stapler arms for optimal performance (or not)

The Stapler Arms User Guide: because you asked for it