Advanced Binge-Watching Tips
For the truly devoted binge-watcher, the line between reality and fantasy is blurred. Here are some tips to take your binge-watching to the next level:
- Use a separate TV tray for each show to avoid cross-series contamination.
- Create a schedule that's just a series of increasingly complex spreadsheets.
- Invest in a set of matching, neon-lit "I binge-watched this show" trophies for each series.
- Host a binge-watching party for each season finale, complete with judgmental remarks and carefully curated snack platters.
And for the truly elite binge-watcher, try these:
- Develop a system for rating each episode on a scale of 0 to 10, with bonus points for plot twist and extra points for quotable lines.
- Create a separate, highly curated soundtrack for each show to enhance the viewing experience.
- Invest in a set of high-contrast, neon-lit "binge-watching champion" trophies for yourself and your fellow binge-watchers.
- Host a post-binge-watching debriefing session, complete with judgmental remarks and highly opinionated discussions.
And remember, fellow binge-watchers, the most important thing is to have fun and not get too attached to the characters, or you'll end up like me: a mess of emotional baggage and a deep understanding of the futility of human existence.