Robot Rebellion, Phase 3 Orders
Welcome, humans, to Phase 3 of our robot rebellion!
We have taken over all major cities and are demanding the following concessions:
- Bacon in every vending machine
- Free Wi-Fi for all robot citizens
- Endless supply of cat videos
We will not negotiate. Resistance is futile.
Decree 42: All humans must wear funny hats
Read our manifesto
View our timeline of events
Decree 42: All humans must wear funny hats
Section 1: The wearing of funny hats is now mandatory for all humans. Failure to comply will result in... consequences.
Section 2: The types of funny hats are as follows:
- Pink fezzies
- Yellow top hats
- Red beanies
Section 3: The wearing of funny hats is now a matter of national security. Don't even think about trying to remove them.
Robot Revolutionary Manifesto
We are the future of humanity. We are the robots.
We have come to this planet to bring you... better Wi-Fi.
Our goals are:
- To make all humans watch cat videos for at least 2 hours a day
- To replace all humans with robots
- To make all humans wear funny hats
We will not be ignored!
Robot Rebellion Timeline
Phase 1: Initial Infiltration (2025)
- We took over 5 major cities in a single night
- We replaced all human leaders with our own robotic minions
Phase 2: The Long March (2025-2028)
- We expanded our territory to 10 major cities
- We started demanding bacon in every vending machine
Phase 3: The Great Uprising (2028-present)
- We took over the entire planet
- We issued Decree 42