Today's alarm clock is currently plotting its revenge against me, the coffee machine is on strike, and I'm pretty sure I left my toast in the toaster.
Somehow, the cat is still asleep on my keyboard. I think I'll just let it stay.
I'm pretty sure I've reached peak crisis, and I'm not sure how much more of this is possible without a hazmat suit.
Today's survival plan involves eating Cheetos and watching cat videos until the clock strikes 5.
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