Caffeine Philosophy: The Caffeine Dialectic
Should I get caffeine? The eternal question. It's like asking, "Should I exist?" or "Should I not?" The answer, like existence itself, is unclear. But let's break it down, shall we?
Pros:
- Increases alertness: You'll be more awake, more productive, and more likely to write terrible, half-coherent, stream-of-consciousness philosophy texts.
- Boosts focus: You'll be able to focus on the existential meaninglessness of life with laser-like precision.
- Enhances creativity: Your thoughts will be a jumbled mess of ideas, but hey, that's art, right?
Cons:
- Dependence: You'll be a slave to the buzz, forever chasing the next fix.
- Insomnia: You'll never sleep again, and your sleep-deprivation-induced hallucinations will make for great writing prompts.
- Exhaustion: You'll be running on empty, like the coffee cups that litter the landscape of your kitchen.
Conclusion: Caffeine: the answer to all life's questions, and the source of all your problems. Or is it the other way around?