Are you tired of waiting for responses? Do you want to feel like you're in a toxic relationship? Look no further than Paranoid Penalties' Ghosting Service! Our expert team of highly trained professionals will string you along for weeks, months, even years, all while pretending to be interested in responding to your messages.
Why not? Because we can! And also because we have better things to do than actually answer your questions. Like playing video games, or eating Cheetos, or contemplating the meaning of life.
• Our team of highly skilled ghosters will keep you on a string for as long as you want, up to and including forever.
• We have a 99.9% response rate of no response, so you'll know you're in good hands!
• And don't worry, our ghosting is completely confidential. Your friends and family will never know the pain and anguish you're going through.
Why Don't I Get Any Peace and Quiet? Ghosting 101: The Art of Not Responding