``` CONSPIRACY THEORIES FOR THE PARANOID AT HEART

Conspiracy Theories for the Paranoiacally Inclined

Warning: The following theories may cause excessive eye-rolling, spontaneous combustion, and/or the sudden urge to build a bunker in the woods.

1. The Lizard King of Mars

Did you know that Elvis is actually the King of Mars, ruling over an empire of intergalactic Elvis impersonators?

2. The Illuminati is Made of Cats