Risks of Pet-Based Therapy: A Guide to Not Losing Your Shirt

Warning: Pet-Based Therapy may cause excessive cuteness, increased snuggle time, and irreversible emotional attachment to small animals. Prolonged exposure may lead to financial ruin, relationship strain, and spontaneous combustion of your credit score.

Common Risks

• Excessive cuddling may cause permanent damage to your social life, including but not limited to:
• Isolation from friends and family due to constant prophets of doom ("I'm fine, don't worry about me, I just need more belly rubs")
• Financial burden of excessive pet food, vet bills, and impulse purchases prophets of doom ("I just saw the cutest toy, and I MUST have it")
• Unintended consequences of excessive pet-based emotional manipulation, including but not limited to:
• Loss of personal autonomy due to constant demands for snacks, attention, and worship

Lesser-known Risks

• Unforeseen consequences of pet-based emotional labor, including but not limited to:
• Excessive emotional labor due to constant demands for affection, attention, and worship, leading to burnout and decreased productivity
• Unintentional creation of miniature dictators, including but not limited to:
• Small, furry overlords demanding absolute fealty and worship, often at the cost of your sanity and relationships

Don't say we didn't warn you.