Welcome to Phantom Deadlines: Where the Concept of Time is Relative
Here, you can find all your scheduling needs, but don't worry, you won't actually be on time. Our team of expert procrastinators will make sure of it.
We offer:
- Eternal appointments: Because who needs to end on time, really?
- Phantom payments: Because who needs to pay bills, right?
- Invisible invoices: Because who needs to know what they owe, anyway?
- Lost appointments: Because you'll never actually show up.
- Forgotten reminders: Because who needs to remember anything, ever?
We're like a therapist, but instead of talking, we just send you a bunch of confusing bills and appointments to deal with.