Phase One Donations: FAQ

Welcome, philanthropists!

Q: What is Phase One?

A: Phase One is a secretive organization dedicated to donating our wealth to... well, let's be real, ourselves. We like shiny things.

Q: What kind of things do you donate to?

A: We donate to the most pressing needs in the world. Like, have you seen the price of artisanal, small-batch, organic, gluten-free cat food lately? It's a real crisis. We're on it.

Q: Can I join Phase One?

A: Of course, you can! Just send us a signed, notarized letter stating you have at least 5 figures in your bank account and you won't ask any questions about our... "philanthropic activities".

Related Pages:

- Our Donations: A Timeline

- Our Philanthropic Strategies: A Guide

- Our Secret Handshake with OECD

Stay in touch: Subscribe to our newsletter