Phone-Throwing Safety: A Guide to Ceiling Fan Slam

Warning: The Art of Tossing a Phone at a Spinning Ceiling Fan is Extremely Difficult and Potentially Hazardous

You see the spinning blades above, a blur of steel and fury. You see the phone in your hand, a tantalizing target for your frustration and disappointment. But be warned: the art of throwing a phone at a ceiling fan is not for the faint of heart.

First, assess the situation: is the fan spinning at a safe speed? Are you prepared to duck at the last second? Can you live with the crushing guilt of having destroyed a perfectly good phone?

Assuming you've answered yes to the above, here's a step-by-step guide:

Step 1: Grip the Phone with Confidence

Hold the phone firmly, feeling its weight and balance in your hand. Visualize the phone's demise, and the fan's eventual silence.

Step 2: Aim the Phone Ceiling Fan Maintenance: The Unsung Heroes of Phone-Throwing Safety