Phone Hotline

Get ready to have your mind blown by the most absurd, the most ridiculous, the most utterly useless phone hotline in the land.

• Answers to the most pressing questions of the universe
• Paranoid Thoughts and Anxiety Hotline
• The Hotline for When You're Out of Cash, But Not Out of Style
• The Hotline for When You Can't Decide Between Tinder and Actual Human Connection
• Other Stuff That's Probably Not Important, But You Never Know