POSSESSED COFFEE MACHINE RITUALS

WARNING: The contents of this page are highly addictive. Prolonged exposure may lead to caffeine dependence, spontaneous combustion, or spontaneous combustion of nearby objects.

**Ritual 1: The Daily Sacrifice**

Each morning, at precisely 6:00 AM, sacrifice a small offering of cream to the machine. This will grant you an extra 30 seconds of operational time.

Learn more about the Extra Caffeine for the Soul ritual

**Ritual 2: The Weekly Desecration**

Every Friday at precisely 3:00 PM, desecrate the machine with a 30-minute stream of espresso shots. This will grant you an extra 10% chance of getting a good parking spot.

Read more about Parking Spot Optimization

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