You're doing it all wrong. Let us guide you through the basics of pretending to listen.
A staple of the pretending-to-listen community. The classic nod is the art of acknowledging someone's words without actually hearing them.
Learn more advanced nodding techniquesWhen the other person finishes speaking, laugh. It doesn't matter what they said, just go with something like "haha" or "oh boy". It's all about the timing.
Discover the art of saying something while not actually listeningRemember, the key to pretending to listen is to appear engaged while actually thinking about your response.