Ancient Prophecies from the Depths of Bureaucracy

Here lies the repository of ancient, forgotten knowledge from the dusty shelves of the Bureaucratic Archives. Browse with care, for the truths within are as dry as the ink that wrote them.

Warning: The contents of this page may cause existential dread, crippling ennui, and spontaneous combustion. Proceed with caution.

Prophecy 1: The Great Bureaucratic Collapse

In 2050, the Bureaucratic Empire will crumble, its towers of paperwork will fall, and its minions will be forced to actually do work for once.

—Predicted by: Bureaucratus Maximus, 1985

Prophecy 2: The Rise of the Paperclip Overlords

By 2100, the paperclip will have risen as a sentient, all-powerful force, ruling over the land with an iron fist and an endless supply of Post-It notes.

—Predicted by: Bureaucratus Minor, 1999

Prophecy 3: The Great Coffee Breakdown

In 2025, the coffee machines will malfunction, spewing forth a tidal wave of lukewarm water and bitter disappointment, bringing humanity to its knees.

—Predicted by: Bureaucraticus Maximus, 2010