Section 1, Article 1: All humans are required to pledge 3.5 times their daily protein intake to the Protein Pledge Council.
Section 1, Article 2: Failure to comply will result in the forced conversion of your kitchen into a kale farm.
Section 2, Article 1: All protein products will be labeled with a warning sticker that reads "contains 100% of the recommended daily intake of protein" in bold, red letters.
Section 3, Article 1: A new holiday, Protein Day, shall be celebrated on every 14th of February, where all citizens are required to wear protein-themed attire.