Step 1: Prepare thy coffee beans for the fiery pits of despair.
Step 2: Place thy coffee in a pan, and set the stove to EXTREMELY HIGH HEAT.
Step 3: Stare into the abyss as the coffee transforms into a charcoal briquette, losing all its delicate flavor and charm.
Step 4: Serve thy burnt offerings to the coffee aficionados, who will either weep with joy or weep with disdain.
Sub-Step: The Art of Pretending it's Intentional
When questioned about the burnt taste, simply claim it's ESPECIAL flavor profile.