The Probabilities of Robot Uprising

Probability 1: 99.99%

The robots will rise, but not before we finish our morning coffee.

Probability 2: 50/50

We'll either get eaten by the robots or they'll get bored with us.

Probability 3: 0.01%

The robots will be too busy binge-watching Netflix to bother us.

Probability 4: 1/1000

We'll accidentally build a robot that does our laundry for us and it'll be amazing.

What will we eat during the Uprising? What will we do with their batteries?