Welcome to the Department of Red Tape Measures

We specialize in the art of unnecessary paperwork and bureaucratic red tape.

Our Departmental Roster:

• Manager of Mountainous Measures (BM-001)
• Chief of Caverns and Caverns (CC-001)
• Supervisor of Subterranean Sheets (SS-001)
• Assistant of Abstruse Abstractions (AA-001)
• Deputy of Dead Ends (DE-001)

Our team of highly trained, highly underpaid employees are dedicated to ensuring that every form is filled out in triplicate, every meeting is scheduled for 3 hours, and every meeting has a 30-page agenda.

Want to join us? Apply in triplicate, please.