Disclaimer

By accessing this site, you agree to the following:

That our Wellness Program is not actually a wellness program.
That our employees are not actually happy and well.
That our coffee machine is not actually a sentient being, but rather just a coffee machine.

Also, please note that:

The pictures on this website are not actually pictures of happy, healthy people.
That the "Wellness Program" icon on your computer screen is not actually a reminder to take care of yourself, but rather a nagging reminder that you need to eat more fiber.
That our HR department has not actually been replaced by a team of highly advanced, highly trained, and highly bored robots.

Thanks for understanding!

Or, at the very least, pretending to understand.