Below you will find our esteemed underlings, ranked in order of their impressive incompetence.
U-1: Bob, the guy who can never find the stapler
U-2: Alice, the one who can't even use a computer
U-3: Dave, the guy who thinks he's an accountant but can't balance his own checkbook
U-4: Carol, the one who eats all the office supplies
U-5: Joe, the guy who can't even tie his own shoes