Safety in Space: A Guide for the Clueless

Welcome to Space Camp: Where we teach you how to not die in space.

Step 1: Wear a spacesuit. No, really, wear a spacesuit. You'll thank me later.

Step 2: Bring a spare spacesuit. You know, just in case.

Step 3: Don't touch anything that looks suspiciously like a giant metal spider.

What to do when you've encountered a space spider

When your spacesuit's cooling system starts malfunctioning

The art of eating a sandwich in zero gravity

Appendix: Advanced Space Safety Protocols