Sofa Scale - Because who needs a normal sofa, anyway?

Measure your sofa to new heights with precision and hilarity

Are you tired of your sofa being just a piece of furniture? Do you want to make it a statement piece? Introducing the Sofa Scale - a device that will measure your sofa's height, length, width, and depth with precision, and then proceed to tell you that it's still just a couch.

Our patented Sofa Scale technology uses the latest in laser-based measurement and AI-powered sarcasm to give you the most accurate readings on the web. And by accurate, we mean completely useless, but also kind of funny.

Learn more about our height-measuring abilities

Discover the true lengths of your sofa's insecurities

Find out how wide your sofa's ego is

Uncover the depths of your sofa's despair

We're not just a scale, we're a journey. A journey to the center of your sofa. A journey of self-discovery, and mild disappointment.

Join us today, and find out what your sofa's true potential is. Or, you know, just stare at it and wonder why you bought it.