A: You don't! We're a subscription service for people who are too busy screaming to actually do anything else. Just pay for us to do all the screaming for you.
A: Our screams are carefully curated to be the most angsty, the most despairing, the most existential. We've got screams for every mood and occasion. From "Why, why, WHYYYYYYYYY" to "I'M GOING TO LOSE MY MIND!!!!!!".
A: Of course! We've got a team of highly trained scream-robots who will deliver your screams to your email inbox on a schedule that suits you best. Just don't forget to set your email filters to "not spam" or they'll get stuck in your spam folder and never reach you.