According to our most esteemed colleague, Professor Timey McTimeface, time is simply a social construct created to make us feel like we're accomplishing something.
It's all about the water cooler breaks, folks. If we didn't have a reason to take a break and gossip about the latest in temporal fashion trends, we'd never know what time it was.
But fear not, fellow time-travelers! For in our next section, we'll be exploring the Theory of Time as a Physical Force, where we'll discover that time is actually a force that's just as real as the gravitational pull of your favorite snack food.