- Because who needs sleep when you can shift into a narcoleptic sloth and just take a three-hour nap in the middle of your shift?
- It's not procrastination, I'm just conserving my energy for the impending doom of the impending apocalypse.
- I'm not late, I'm just fashionably delayed. My cat is still deciding what to wear.
- I'm on a break, not a vacation. There's a difference, right?
- It's not a break, it's a scheduled reboot. My systems are just updating to the latest in shifterware.
Management-approved Shift Breaks
Shifters Union: Because You're Not Alone in This Shiftless World