Medical Profile

Your Medical Profile

Name: John D. Doe

Age: 42

Occupation: Freelance SimSurvivor

Medical Conditions:

• Severe Sarcasm Overload Syndrome (SSOS)
• Temporary Blindness from Excessive Gaming (TBEG)
• Occasional Existential Dread Syndrome (OEDS)

Treatment Plans

Current Medication:

• Anti-Sarcasm Pills (ASPs)
• Eye Drops (TBEG)
• Existential Crutch Therapy (ECT)

Emergency Procedures

If symptoms worsen, please:

1. Calmly whisper "Everything will be alright" in their ear.
2. Administer an extra dose of Anti-Sarcasm Pills (ASPs).
3. Call for an existential therapist.

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