Smalltalker's Worst Code Practices

Warning: Do not attempt to follow in real life. This is purely for entertainment purposes.

A list of the most atrocious coding practices that will make your colleagues cry, your users weep, and your compiler wince.

Practice 1: Magic Numbers

Using arbitrary numbers in your code without explanation or documentation. Why? Because you're too lazy to do it right.

Learn more about Magic Numbers

Practice 2: Single Responsibility Principle Abandonment

Writing functions that do one thing and one thing only. What's the fun in being predictable and maintainable?

See the horrors of Single Responsibility Principle Abandonment

Practice 3: Global Variables for Days

Using globals because, hey, who needs encapsulation, really?

Witness the travesty of Global Variables for Days