Snack 5000 - Contact Us (Seriously, We're Not Made of Money)

For those who still can't find the "Contact Us" button on the website, here it is. Congratulations.

Send us an Email, if you must.

snack5000@example.com (We'll get to it, eventually.)

Name: Email (We'll never read this): Message (We'll ignore it): Submit (and wait 4-6 weeks for a response)

Don't bother reading about us, really.

We have policies, but you're not going to find them here.