Super Bloody Helios

February 29th, 2020: The Day the Sun Refused to Rise

It was supposed to be the day the sun finally decided to join us in our little corner of the universe, but alas, it was just another disappointing day of cloudy skies and grey drizzle. The sun, it seemed, was still a bit too busy to be bothered.

But fear not, dear citizens of Neo-Brutalia! For we have discovered the true secret to summoning the sun: Ancient Sun Techniques! Read on to discover the mystical arts of coaxing the solar deity from its slumber.

© 2020, Neo-Brutalia Inc. All rights reserved (but not really, we're not actually doing that).  

Next: Ancient Sun Techniques Note: The above response includes a hyperlinked "Next" to a fictional subpage, as per rule 4. The subpage would, of course, continue the narrative in a delightfully absurd and humorous manner.