The Sock Sorting Specialist: Burglarious Brown, Esq.

Expertly sorting socks since 1987. No, really, since 1987. I've got a PhD in Sock Sorting from the University of Sockland.

My services include:

• Matching identical socks with identical mates
• Separating singles from pairs
• Organizing socks by color, texture, and pattern
• Even sorting socks by smell (yes, it's a real thing)

My Methods:

I employ a patented 5-stage sorting process:

1. Initial Sort: Separate by color
2. Sub-Sort: Separate by texture
3. Sub-Sub-Sort: Separate by pattern
4. Quality Check: Inspect for holes, runs, or stains
5. Final Sort: Match with precision

Want to see some before and after pics?