After months of investigation, our top-secret Sock Research Facility has finally cracked the code.
The Sock Gate conspiracy is real, folks. It's a vast network of underground bunkers, hidden in plain sight.
We've uncovered evidence of a massive sock-sorting facility in the basement of a nondescript building in suburban Chicago.
Our team of expert Sock Sleuths has infiltrated the operation, gathering intel and snapping incriminating photos:
ประกimately: