Sock Holes: A Paranoiacal Theory

A comprehensive guide to the existential dread of losing a sock in the wash.

In the depths of the universe, there exists a phenomenon so profound, so earth-shattering, that it defies the very fabric of our reality. It is the Sock Hole Theory.

It states that every time a sock goes missing in the wash, the fabric of space-time is forever altered, leaving us with a gaping hole in the very fabric of our existence.

The Sockhole Effect: A phenomenon where the disappearance of a sock creates a localized distortion in the space-time continuum, causing an increase in anxiety and despair.

Paranoid Patterns: A guide to recognizing the telltale signs of a sock hole, and the steps to take when confronted with the abyss of missing socks.