Weekly Sock Inspection:
Every Sunday at 3:00 AM, our team of highly trained sock inspectors will be crawling through the ranch to ensure that all socks are properly paired and not plotting against us.
- Week 1-4: Sock sorting and re-pairing of all novelty socks
- Week 5-8: Special attention to the sock drawer's most egregious offenders (i.e., the socks with the wonky toes)
- Week 9-12: Random sock rearrangement for maximum entropy reduction
Sandal Maintenance Schedule:
Every other Wednesday at 2:00 PM, our team of expert sandal technicians will be on hand to ensure that all sandals are properly polished and free from sandal-astrophic tendencies.
- Week 1-6: Sandal buffing and conditioning
- Week 7-12: Sandal repair and replacement of broken straps
Hat Maintenance Schedule:
Every other Thursday at 10:00 AM, our team of highly skilled hat artisans will be on hand to ensure that all hats are properly fluffed and not harboring any malevolent thoughts.
- Week 1-8: Hat re-fluffing and de-tangling of any errant brims
- Week 9-12: Hat re-dyeing and re-styling to keep up with the latest hat trends