The Socks of Justification Theory is a radical new concept developed by renowned scholar, Dr. Sockius Maximus.
According to Dr. Sockius, the universe is comprised of 7 distinct types of socks:
This sock is responsible for giving you an excuse to wear anything you want. "I'm wearing these ripped up jeans because it's a Sock of Justification, man!"
This sock gives you a sense of belonging. "Dude, I've got the Sock of Validation, I'm basically a part of the cool crowd!"
This sock lets you understand and relate to others. "I'm wearing the Sock of Empathy, so I can totally understand why you're wearing a 'I'm with stupid' t-shirt."
This sock makes you sound smart. "I'm wearing the Sock of Logic, so I can totally justify why pineapple pizza is a bad idea."
This sock inspires artistic expression. "Dude, I'm wearing the Sock of Creativity, so I'm basically a modern art mastermind."
This sock keeps you grounded. "I'm wearing the Sock of Balance, so I'm not too full of myself, man."
This sock gives you a sense of perspective. "I'm wearing the Sock of Disproportion, so my pants are basically 100 feet long."