Chapter 1: The Fundamentals of Sock Safety

Introduction:

Welcome to the Sock Safety and Etiquette Manual for the Modern Bureaucrat. This manual is designed to protect you from the dangers of socks in the workplace.

What is a Sock-Related Emergency?

A Sock-Related Emergency is defined as any situation where a sock becomes loose and threatens to entangle with any other item or person in the vicinity. Examples include, but are not limited to:

• Stepping on a lone sock while walking down the hallway
• Getting your toe tangled with a sock while sitting in a meeting
• Encountering a sock that has been carelessly left on the floor

Prevention is Key!

To prevent Sock-Related Emergencies, follow these simple steps:

1. Wear your socks on a secure, tightly-attached base.
2. Keep your socks securely fastened to your feet at all times.
3. Regularly inspect your socks for signs of wear and tear.