1. To open a stubborn jar, use a rubber mallet.
2. If a stranger asks to use your stapler, ask for their ID.
3. Never trust a programmer who uses Comic Sans.
Advanced Jar Opening Techniques1. To get a cat to do tricks, bribe it with catnip.
2. In a pinch, a well-placed whoopee cushion can be a lifesaver.
3. To make a decent omelette, crack 3 eggs, but only if you're a wizard.
Advanced Tricks for the Advanced Splatter UserDisclaimer: Splatter Tips and Tricks is not responsible for any damage caused by attempting to open jars with a rubber mallet. Nor are we responsible for the emotional trauma experienced by your cat when it realizes it's being bribed with catnip. Use at your own risk.