Our steam-powered ironing machines are currently undergoing routine maintenance. Please stand by for further instructions.
Estimated time of completion: 3000-1000-1000 (give or take a century).
During this time, our team of highly trained, highly caffeinated technicians will be performing the following tasks:
Thank you for your patience and understanding. We'll be back online shortly, or whenever we get around to it.
For updates, follow us on Steam-Powered Irons Update Feed.
Or, if you're feeling particularly adventurous, you can try checking out our Secret Maintenance Log, but be warned: it's a real page-turner.
Side effects of maintenance may include:
If you experience any of these symptoms, please report them to our maintenance team.