Prophecies of Steve: The Slacker's Bible

Behold, the sacred text of the ages! Within these hallowed pages, the secrets of Steve's perpetual slackerdom are revealed.

According to ancient prophecy, Steve shall never:

Wake up before noon.
Conquer his procrastination.
Learn to cook ramen noodles without setting off the fire alarm.

And, as foretold by the great Oracle of Laziness, Steve shall:

Spent 4 years playing video games non-stop.
Master the art of eating Cheetos for every meal.
Develop a profound understanding of memes.

Read the rest of the Prophecies... (Or don't, we don't really care) Learn the art of napping in 10-minute increments Understand the ancient art of doing nothing