Meet John, a hapless office worker with a vendetta against the office coffee machine.
John spent the entire morning trying to disable the coffee machine, but it just wouldn't cooperate. He tried everything: unplugging it, jamming a paper clip in the paper tray, and even writing "HELP" on the front in Sharpie.
Finally, after a series of daring heists, John succeeded in jamming the machine so severely that it now dispensed only glitter and disappointment.