Sugar High

The Uncontrollable, Unrelenting, and Utterly Unfortunate Condition

You've been diagnosed with a severe case of Sugar High. Symptoms include:

• Excessive consumption of sweet treats
• Uncontrollable cravings for sparkly things
• Unrelenting desire to watch cat videos
• Utterly unfortunate ability to recite the entire script of "The Great Gatsby" backwards while blindfolded

Don't worry, it's treatable. But don't expect a cure anytime soon. You'll be on sugar high for the rest of your life.