A: Because our lawyers made us.
Q: I'm experiencing strange dreams about giant hamsters in trench coats.
A: That's just our new "Hamster-Whisperer" feature. Don't worry, it's just a side effect of our advanced subliminal messaging technology.
Q: Can I opt out?
A: No. You're already in too deep.
Q: Will I start to involuntarily buy more velvet paintings?
A: That's just the hamster-whisperer's bonus feature. You'll also start to involuntarily buy more velvet paintings. Don't worry, it's just the price of security.
See also: