Welcome to Superposition of Savings, where our interest rates are as high as our expectations. Our unique approach to temporal investing allows you to save your hard-earned cash while also earning interest on the interest you've yet to earn. Yes, it's a paradox, but don't worry, we've got it all figured out. Learn more about Chrono-Savings
We've got a special deal for you! If you sign up for our Paradoxical Pension Plan, you'll get a free year's supply of existential dread with every deposit.
Our competitors may offer you a 1:1 ratio of risk to reward, but we say, "Why settle for that?" Our Superposition of Savings offers a 1:2 ratio, because who needs stability, anyway?