The Great Outdoors Survival Guide

Warning: the natural world is a cruel and unforgiving place. But fear not, dear reader, for we have you covered.

Chapter 1: What Not to Do

Don't do this:

• Don't go outside without sunscreen, unless you enjoy lobster-like skin.
• Don't attempt to hug a bear. It's just not worth it.
• Don't drink from the stream. You might get a stomachache.

And remember: the best way to make friends with wildlife is to pretend you're a tree.

Chapter 2: Advanced Survival Techniques

For the truly adventurous:

• Learn to make a fire without matches. It's a real party trick.
• Find a way to purify water without getting sick. Or, you know, die.
• Build a shelter that won't collapse in the rain. Or a tornado. Or a gentle breeze.

We also recommend reading "The Art of Not Getting Lost" and "The Joy of Not Being Eaten by a Wild Animal".

Subchapter 1: The Art of Not Getting Lost

Don't be this guy:

Instead, use our patented navigation technique:

1. Face north.
2. Cross your fingers.
3. Hope for the best.