Product Description:
This is the most basic smartphone known to humanity. It comes with:
- A 1.5 inch screen that will make you wonder how you ever lived with such a small display
- 4GB of storage, which is roughly the amount of space you need for a decent selfie
- 1% battery life, because who needs more than that?
- And a camera that takes 1 megapixel photos, because who needs more details, anyway?
Features:
- Basic phone app that just shows the time and date
- No internet, because who needs the world at their fingertips?
- No music player, because silence is golden (or so we've heard)
- Just a calculator that adds, subtracts, multiplies, and divides, because math is hard, man