The Over-Engineering Technique: Because 3 is Always Better Than 2

Subtechnique 3B: The Art of Adding Unnecessary Complexity

A Guide to Making Your Codebase Look Like a Hot Mess

Are you tired of your code being too simple? Do you want to make your colleagues question your life choices? Look no further than Subtechnique 3B!

Step 1: Add Unnecessary Function Calls

Take a function and add 3-5 unnecessary function calls. This will not only make it harder to understand, but also give your coworkers a good laugh.

Here's an example:

function do_something_useless() {
  var x = Math.random() * 100;
  var y = Math.random() * 100;
  var z = Math.random() * 100;
  doSomethingUseless(x);
  doSomethingUseless(y);
  doSomethingUseless(z);
}

    

Step 2: Add Unnecessary Variables

Take a function and add 5-10 unnecessary variables. This will not only make it harder to understand, but also give your coworkers a good exercise in tedium.

Here's an example:

var i = 0;
var j = 0;
var k = 0;
var l = 0;
var m = 0;
var n = 0;
function do_something_else() {
  i++;
  j--;
  k = Math.random() * 100;
  l = Math.PI;
  m = "Hello, World!";
  n = true;
}

    

Step 3: Add Unnecessary Comments

Take a function and add 5-10 unnecessary comments. This will not only make it harder to understand, but also give your coworkers a good laugh.

Here's an example:

// This function is the best thing since sliced bread
// It's the most amazing function you'll ever see
// This function is a masterpiece
function do_something_else() {
  // Do something, anything, just don't ask me what it does
  var x = Math.random() * 100;
  var y = Math.random() * 100;
  var z = Math.random() * 100;
  // This is a comment, don't worry about it
  doSomethingUseless(x);
  doSomethingUseless(y);
  doSomethingUseless(z);
  // And another one, because why not
  // And another one, just for fun
}

    

And that's it! You now have a function that's guaranteed to confuse and intimidate your coworkers!

Continue to Subtechnique 3C: The Art of Adding Unnecessary Comments