Our patented Nail Growth Accelerator is a revolutionary device that uses advanced nanotechnology to stimulate nail growth at an unprecedented rate. Simply place the device on your finger, set the timer, and get ready to have the longest, strongest nails in town!
Our unique algorithm injects microscopic nanorods into your nail bed, stimulating collagen production and accelerating nail growth by up to 300%!
Side effects may include:
- Excessive nail growth leading to awkwardly long fingernails.
- Uncontrollable desire to wear bright pink polish.
- Spontaneous combustion of nearby hair accessories.