It's another royal birthday, and another excuse for the royal family to squabble over who gets to sit on the throne.
The Queen, resplendent in her finest "I'm-a-great-and-powerful-queen" attire, has decreed that the birthday boy/girl must be treated like a true monarch, complete with a 24/7 coterie of sycophants.
The King, on the other hand, is more concerned with his own royal lineage, and has begun to question the legitimacy of his own succession to the throne.
Meanwhile, the Princess has declared that the only thing she wants for her birthday is a good ol' fashioned family feud, complete with backroom deals, whispered secrets, and possibly a few carefully-placed poison darts.
Will the prophets of the royal family's pasts be able to broker peace, or will the family's petty squabbles tear it asunder? Stay tuned, folks!