Welcome to Philosophical Crisis Counseling, where the existential dread and absurdity of life are normalized.
Our expert counselors are trained in the art of making you question your own existence and wonder if the meaning of life is just a bunch of meaningless drivel.
Services include:
Don't worry, we won't judge you (much). Come for the existential angst, stay for the crippling sense of despair.
Or, you know, just come for the free Wi-Fi and comfy couches. We have those too.
Counseling sessions are conducted by our team of experts, including:
We're open Monday through Thursday, 9 to 5. Fridays and weekends, we're closed. Because, you know, the meaning of life is just a bunch of meaningless drivel.
Address: 1234, Existential Avenue, Nowheresville, USA
Contact: 555-555-5555